3 Villainous Ministers

3 Villainous Ministers by Jeremiah Craig
March 30, 2018 Jeremiah Craig 0 Comments

What did you want to do as a profession when you were younger? Being a History Teacher is what interested me the most and after graduating from high school, I pursued it with excitement. The only thing I didn’t realize was that the industry is subject to standards set by governments which I found would hold students back from learning efficiently and would hold me back as a teacher.

Ultimately, I decided to change majors but the love of history stayed with me and it was thanks to these early history courses that I became enamored by the ancient Mongol Empire.

The Mongols were fierce, violent, and pretty much unstoppable for several decades. Plus, they were smart. The rulers realized the importance of keeping aspects of an area’s culture after they conquered a region.

So, they were one of the first empires to allow for freedom of religion. The only problem with this is that not every culture agreed that there should be freedom of religion in their area in the first place.

After the Chinese were conquered by Khubilai Khan, the presence of the Mongols and other people in their land, was an insult to say the least. The Chinese would take every opportunity to undermine the Mongol Empire without openly facing them in battle.

One such case, that I read about in Khubilai Khan: His Life and Times by Morris Rossabi, occurred with Khubilai Khan’s tax ministers. These tax ministers were never Chinese. They were either Mongol or Persian most of the time and would often use their position of power to their advantage by accepting favors or demanding extra taxes, which they would quickly pocket.

The Chinese would keep track of tax ministers’ abuse of power and eventually they would have enough evidence to have the tax minister removed from their position (which also involved that tax minister being removed from this plain of existence by the Mongols if you catch my drift). The Chinese were able to remove three tax ministers from their position using this technique of undermining Mongol rule.

I enjoyed this story in Khubilai Khan: His Life and Times and so naturally, I had to turn it into a song. Please enjoy “3 Villainous Ministers” below. Thanks for reading!

3 Villainous Ministers

We made three villainous ministers
With all our textbook conspirators
We planted the crystals
We planted the jewels
To watch them grow up and break the rule
Follow me to that holy man’s home
I’ll show you his red hand print
Shame his home as he shamed our own
He’s just as heaven sent
As Diablo

We made three villainous ministers
With clarity of expert translators
They covered the honest
They covered the right
With ashes from battle and tucked them in tight
Follow me to that holy man’s home
I’ll show you how this leader limps
Shame his bones as he shamed our own
He’s just as heaven sent
As Diablo

This reign is still short in years
They’re still damp behind the ears
I’ll take my home back after you forget me
We’ll be steady, always steady

We made three villainous ministers
With senses better than the trespassers
We nurtured masses
We nurtured the prince
To see your every move and ready our offence
Follow me to the last holy man’s home
Just ask the brothel, he’s on their list
Shame his home as he shamed our own
He’s just as heaven sent
As diablo